whats with all the screaming anyways?

Okay, I found another website....
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/all

This one features the all-time best real-life posts from craig's list. Many of the entries are crude and crass or at least crushingly cynical...so I won't really encourage you to visit the site and will instead offer my favorite Craig's List posts. I give you "To the Woman Who Maced Me" :

"I saw you jogging around the lake and followed you to Dunn brothers. I was trying to work up my courage to get out of my van and go into Dunn brothers but you were only inside for 30 minutes. As you left the coffee shop I followed you slowly as you walked up the block. I think you got nervous when I hit the garbage cans that some jerk left on the boulevard! I guess I did hop the curb, but still, they were pretty close to the street. Anyways, I watched you start to run and I wanted to explain what happened, you started screaming for help as I tackled you, whats with the screaming anyways? And why do women always scream when I try to talk at them? Anyways, thats when I got a face full of mace...that was three days ago, and I was just released from the jail. I was hoping you could meet me and possibly drop the charges. "

and here is "To the drunk hottie who fell off my motorcycle":

"I met you at the bar last night, and we hit it off. Ya we were both a little buzzed, but you seemed as into me as I was into you. Things got to things, we made out a bit, and you ended up going home with me on the back of my motorcycle, which was awesome because that doesn't usually happen to me. I luckily had the extra helmet with me and let you wear my bike jacket while suffering the cold on the way home. I was feeling pretty happy and lucky to say the least.
This is where things got crazy.
I don't know if you slipped, or thought I was taking you home to kill you, or if your're just plain crazy and had a change of heart, but all of a sudden you let go of me MID-TURN and went flying into the bushes at about 10-15mph near the park by my house. I was so freaked out!!! when I looked back to see you fumbling in the bushes I could only PRAY TO GOD that you didn't hit the asphalt or something worse.
I really thought you must have been hurt at least a bit, but as I turned around to come check on you, you took off into the unlit park running full speed with my helmet and jacket still on! I parked my bike and looked for you for over 2 hours calling your name until I was so cold I had to go home or risk freezing to death.
Im sorry for what happened and I really hope your're ok, really I do, but seriously. Running into a forested park in the middle of the night like that....I really can't begin to guess what you were thinking, and you weren't that drunk, and from the speed you took off I can only surmise that your're not that hurt. I would like my expensive bike gear back though, I hope it kept you warm during your psychotic episode, but it IS mine and I kinda need it to get around in the winter. If you could return it to the bar for me, check in with your shrink, and promise to never come near me again that would be great, cause you scared the poop outta me and are costing me alot of money.
Sincerely,
Very cold/poor motorcycle rider who will never let women near his bike again. "

Comments

Boy About Town said…
I know when I mace someone, or they mace me I always feel a bond with them don't you?! I am sure there is a whole fetish underground into macing! And lets face it craigslist is headquarters for underground fetishs!